I was approached and asked; how do I fight all the loneliness, the hurts and pains, the disappointments in life, and the answer is also spoken by this song.

Most of the time, despite the knowledge of God that I have, if I’m not careful, they just stay as head knowledge. Most of the time, it’s really easy to get lost, if you see your problem as thick as a forest rather than a bush outside your window.

I know the answers, I’ve given them all.
But suddenly now, I feel so small.
Shaken down to the cavity in my soul.
I know the doctrine and theology,
But right now they don’t mean much to me.
This time there’s only one thing I’ve got to know.

When confusion creeps in, know that what He has promised you will come to pass…

Do I trust You, Lord?
Does the robin sing?
Do I trust You, Lord?
Does it rain in spring?
You can see my heart,
You can read my mind,
And You got to know
That I would rather die
Than to lose my faith
In the One I love.
Do I trust You, Lord?
Do I trust You?

Sometimes my little heart can’t understand
What’s in Your will, what’s in Your plan.
So many times I’m tempted to ask You why,
But I can never forget it for long.
Lord, what You do could not be wrong.
So I believe You, even when I must cry.
Do I trust You, Lord?
Does the river flow?
Do I trust You, Lord?
Does the north wind blow?
You can see my heart,
You can read my mind,
And You got to know
That I would rather die
Than to lose my faith
In the One I love.
Do I trust You, Lord?
Do I trust You?

I know the answers, I’ve given them all.
But suddenly now, I feel so small.
Shaken down to the cavity in my soul.
I know the doctrine and theology,
But right now they don’t mean much to me.
This time there’s only one thing I’ve got to know.

Do I trust You, Lord?
Does the robin sing?
Do I trust You, Lord?
Does it rain in spring?
You can see my heart,
You can read my mind,
And You got to know
That I would rather die
Than to lose my faith
In the One I love.
Do I trust You, Lord?
Do I trust You?

I will trust You, Lord, when I don’t know why.
I will trust You, Lord, till the day I die.
I will trust You, Lord, when I’m blind with pain!
You were God before, and You’ll never change.
I will trust You.
I will trust You.
I will trust You, Lord.
I will trust You.

I guess it’s just right that since she’s been hoarding from me that I should take this time for myself. She probably thinks that because I don’t look “poor” and I still “smell good” that I got lots and lots of money. I don’t know whether to laugh or get upset with her attitude. Does it mean that when I buy a perfume I have to gobble it all up in one day? You spray on perfume, not bathe it. And what’s with the “not looking poor” do I have to be in sacks just to show everybody that hey I don’t have money in my pockets? Do I need to refrain myself from bathing just to show people that I’m feeling desolate because I have no money? Hello?

Sure I have it, but then again, she needs to learn her lessons that she can’t milk me like what she’s doing. I haven’t even seen the meralco bill yet, so what payments are we talking about? How can I be sure that that really is my consumption? The last time I calculated my electric bill was short with what she’s charging me. I will pay for the water bill and the electricity bill by next month. She should know how to wait and not bother me when it’s not even my due. Last time, she (tried) to trick me into giving her more than I owe. She already asked me for a hundred pesos that’s supposed to be taken off on my next payment, but then she pretended that I didn’t understand what she said. Yes, I did let it pass me by because I know that this time is going to come. Let her wait, I’m not the only one who get’s behind payments. I have it, I just want to teach her a lesson that she cannot bully me everytime. Yes, I am upset.

One of my online friends is going to get married this summer, and she invited me to their wedding. I have been looking for something to give her as a gift that would last and meaningful, kind of like something that she can use and remember our friendship. When I went to Shoe Mart, there was a wide array of stuff that I can buy for her as a wedding gift. I’ve been contemplating between the electronic and the china wares. Now, since fine china’s are really expensive, I need to be wise in choosing the right one. When I got home, another friend of mine and I checked online for wholesale china collectibles, and compare prices. We found out that it’s more affordable to get authentic ones online, there’s a variety of designs you can choose from too, and they come with certificates of authenticity. I’m sure that she’d love to have them as decorations, because of the intricate designs and the fragility, she may just decide to put them on a locked glass shelf or something.